Kakuzu: Threeshots of the Way Back
by Koplak from the Equator
Summary: Witness the past of young Kakuzu through rough childhood, cruel youth, and ironic adulthood. He was not as strong and gruff as he is today...because even the worst criminals started small. Warning: violence.
1. Shards of Childhood

_I wasn't born in a good family._

_Well, yes, I have parents and quite a number of siblings. But that was just the outline of it._

_I was the third child from four. The oldest was my sister, then my brother, me, and my little sister. It looked just fine, but it wasn't so fine anymore after my mother died. She had no illness, insanity problems, nor addiction to drugs. It was all thanks to my father: the savage, bloodthirsty creature whose sperm had produced me and my siblings. I saw how it happened and I hate to remember it._

_My father didn't drink. In fact, he hated alcohol. But, no one was perfect; he was always angry; always full of hatred. When he was still young, he was known for his genocidal hobby. It was a great shock to see him actually fall in love with my mother and had four kids. Even my grandfather—my mother's father and the only adult I could trust—said that he couldn't believe his daughter's flow of mind._

_Now that my mother was gone, his objects of bullying and torture were us, his children._

* * *

"Hey, Kakuzu! Clean the bathroom properly, will ya?!" shouted the savage-looking man who was also Kakuzu's father.

Timidly, the eleven year-old boy scurried to the bathroom, holding a pail of water and an overused piece of cloth. In this dirty house, he had to do all the chores, especially the cleaning. His oldest sister, Rikako, and his older brother, Oniji, were forced to work while their ages were fifteen and thirteen respectively. Rikako worked in a shop while Oniji worked as a newspaper boy.

While the two older ones were forced to work outdoors, the two younger ones were forced to work indoor. Actually, only one younger ones that worked. Kakuzu's younger sister, Mihoko, could barely work anything—except cooking. She was still five and the best she could do was to come up to her older siblings and asked them to play, then later found herself get spanked by her own father.

Kakuzu brushed the tiles with full of effort and slipped due to the slippery floor. His hand accidentally knocked the pail off and spilled the water everywhere. It made a sound too clear to be ignored. Kakuzu silently counted the seconds before his father barged inside, bawling, "You useless idiotic little rat! You screw everything, ya moron! Now look at this place! It stinks! Like you! Get up and get back to work, ya mongrel!" he kicked Kakuzu's side which made the boy fall again. Struggling, Kakuzu got up to all fours and casted a sharp glare at the man who just kicked him.

Nevertheless, he still brushed the remaining dirty spots in the bathroom. Seconds afterwards, he noticed the presence of his little sister. He glanced at her and he saw her worried eyes. The eyes that reminded him of his mother. Taking a deep breath, he softened the look of his eyes and smiled at her.

* * *

_I envied Rikako and Oniji so much. They got mother's attention for a good longer time than me or even Mihoko._

_I envied them more when they got a job outside the house while I was harnessed with an invisible dog leash. I was like the giant wolf Fenrir, struggling and yearning to get off. But unlike Fenrir, I get to meet my grandfather everyday even without my father's notice._

_Secretly, my grandfather made a secret tunnel under the seventh tatami of my room. Together with Mihoko, we escaped in the afternoon and went to grandfather's house. My grandfather was a ninja; in fact, he used to become the head of ANBU until he decided to retire. His relationship with his grandchildren was strongest with me and Mihoko, since we spent more time with him rather than Rikako and Oniji._

_While in his house, he taught me ninja skills ever since I was seven. While he taught me how to defend myself, grandmother taught Mihoko how to cook. Grandfather also taught me medical ninjutsu, just in case. He said I will need it. And hell yeah, I did. The medical ninjutsu he taught me saved Mihoko's misery after she got spanked by our father. I also healed Oniji huge sword cut on his wrists and Rikako's lashed back._

_Not being cocky but…it's good to know that they envy me too. That made us even._

* * *

The shriek of the kettle signaled the end of Kakuzu's ninja training. The boys always knew what that meant: tea time. Any minute now, Mihoko would appear from the living room and waved vigorously at her brother and grandfather.

"Oniichan! Ojiichan! It's tea time! C'mon!" Mihoko called over the two men. Kakuzu nodded at her, bringing a wide smile to her face. "I'll be waiting with Grandma!" Mihoko rushed back inside the house, leaving the two men stretched before they took a break.

Kakuzu's smile evaporated as soon as Mihoko was out of sight. It was only in this place…only in this place can she smile so innocently and sweetly. Her mother-like hazel eyes could sparkle richly in this place. Kakuzu would really like to see his youngest sister to be happy. Under their father's bloodshot eyes, his sister was suffering. His muses blitzed and gone in a blink of an eye as his grandfather's sturdy hands tapped his gradually broadening shoulders. He turned to look at him.

"Take it easy, lad. She's going to be all right. She's strong, just like you." his grandfather soothed him. The two talked as they walked into the house.

"I'm still worried, Grandpa. What if she ends up like Mom? I always can't do my job well back at home if I can't monitor her from my position. I'm always…paranoid." Kakuzu shivered at the end of sentence. His grandfather rubbed his upper arm warmly.

"I know. I'm worried about you too. Not only you and Mihoko, but Rikako and Oniji too. If it weren't because your mother's last wish, I would be there every day."

"But Grandpa! I don't want to live there anymore! I'm sick of his treatment! I wish he would just disappear!" Kakuzu ranted, curling his fingers into a tight fist. It was so tight his nails could hurt his own palm if his grandfather didn't calm him down.

"Now, now, boy. After all, he is still your father. He is the one who raised you and your siblings."

"I don't think compelling your own children to become a slave is a right way to raise them." Kakuzu retorted crossly.

"Well, you got that right." As they cleaned their muddy shoes on the nearest grass, Kakuzu's grandfather was considering of something silently. He paused the thinking as soon as his lips touched the tea his wife and granddaughter made for all of them. Kakuzu's grandfather drank and ate fast, so it only took him one minute and couple of seconds to finish a cup full of tea. When the bottom of the glass met the surface of the table, he began, "Kakuzu, Mihoko…"

His grandchildren paused drinking and eating onigiri to turn and pay attention to their old-timer.

"Pack your things tonight. You're moving out of that hellhole." he finished straightforwardly. His straight face remained even when he saw his granddaughter cheered and cuddled her grandmother. Meanwhile, her brother stared at him deadpan.

"Are you serious…?" Kakuzu didn't wait for an answer; he jumped to another question. "How about Rikako-neesan and Oniji-niisan? Have you told them to move in with you and Grandma?"

Kakuzu's grandfather's facial expression darkened into a sober one, "They turned me down. They got jobs and they don't want to lose them."

"Pssh. Those two are always so loyal to dad. I don't know what's in their mind. Come to think of it, dad doesn't hit them as often as he hits me and Mihoko-chan. This is so unfair." Kakuzu huffed and crossed his arms.

"Your brother and sister, though, gave you and your little sister choice whether to live with me or not. I see that your sister is delighted with the idea. It is because of the unfairness that I strongly suggest you better take my invitation."

"How about dad? He'll chase us. He'll hunt us. He's going to trouble you, Grandpa." Kakuzu's paranoia halted by the hand of his grandfather rubbing gently on his black choppy hair. He stared at him in puzzlement.

"I'm a ninja and he's not. Even in my sixty-fifth age, I still can kick some butt. Your father won't be a problem, son." he smiled warmly; the smile that twanged a harp string in Kakuzu's heart. The smile that violently swept all his fears and worries. A smile he could never, ever doubt. Trembling, Kakuzu pounced to hug his grandfather. In less than a minute, his grandfather's chest was wet with tears.

"Thank you…" Kakuzu sniffled. "Thank you, Grandpa…"

* * *

_I never felt that happy in my entire childhood. I've spent my times plotting sinful demise for the savage who created me and my siblings; being offered to live in a better home was like...God had offered you to come to heaven without going through death—just ascend to the sky. Like King Arthur had given you his kingdom, sword, and treasures for FREE._

_I still couldn't understand Rikako and Oniji's decision to turn down grandpa's kind offer. What, are they bound with blood contract or something? Until this very day, I couldn't seem to understand, no matter how many experience I have tasted. It just seemed so…far-fetched._

_Full with vigor, happiness, excitement, and all sorts of positive emotion charge, Mihoko and I crawled quickly through our secret tunnel. Mihoko unstoppably singing tunes about going to live with grandpa and grandma, the cats and making manju cakes. Her rare face-splitting smile brightened me that I couldn't help but to grin after her songs._

_I quietly (but quickly) rushed to my room, grabbed an object which I can make a bag of (it turned out to be my bed sheet), and threw all my good clothes. I'll buy new and better ones, anyway, and I kept growing. I have no poetries, collage, or anything to remind me of some precious moments with my family. My bruises are the memories of my family. I have no toys. My toys are the shuriken, kunai, and paper bombs._

_I won't miss the house I was born. Why should I? All I could remember was the lashing, the kicking, the punching, the insulting, and in rare occasions, the slicing. I wanted to forget them all. I wanted to start a new life. I wanted a peace of mind._

_Unfortunately, before all that could be bestowed to me, I just _had to_ quarrel some more. In fact, this was my first hand-to-hand quarrel after those trainings._

* * *

"Where do you think you're going, little lady?" Kakuzu's father confronted Mihoko. He heard her singing about making manju cakes with his mother-in-law. He disliked them; they were too nosy for his taste.

Mihoko squeaked in terror. She backed away from him, hugging her bag close to her chest. Like Kakuzu, she didn't have much to put inside. She squeaked even more when she heard the crackling fingers of her father. That _never_ meant anything good. "Daddy, please…no…" she wailed, tears gushed to her cheeks. However, those tears only made her father's deathly covet to grow and grow.

"You gonna leave the house, huh? Over my dead body, little brat. You are going to stay here and cook for me, understand? Now go, you—"

"No! I don't want to! No!" Mihoko screamed and scurried from the room. She may be faster than her father whose daily activity was sitting and eating and smoking, but due to the small space of her room, she was easily caught. Her arm strapped by her father's bigger hands. He yanked her back, causing her to tumble abrasively to the tatami. She squealed shrilly, "Kakuzu-niichan!! HELP!!!"

Kakuzu was right on time to reach his endangered sister. He saw what his father was about to do and his bed sheet bag dropped to the wooden floor as he jumped and made his most extreme move. He swung his left leg and his shin met ruthlessly with his father's lumpy cheek. His two-year ninja training paid off; his father released his sister's puny arm. Mihoko hurried to guard behind Kakuzu's back.

"You little trash! How dare you…" the savage man hissed.

"You may be my father, but no one can treat Mihoko like that. That is still called abusing! We're moving out and there's no way you can get after us!" Kakuzu exclaimed at the man he no longer considered as family ever since the kick.

"You ungrateful little shit. Fine. Maybe I don't have to go after you two. I might just finish you off here!" he swung his giant arms to squish the little kids but they had ran out of the door. "Come back here! I'm going to crush you two into juice!"

Kakuzu carried Mihoko on his shoulder and ran to the front door. He wouldn't risk going through the secret tunnel because that would only reveal a secret he had been laboriously keeping. His fears played its scenario: Kakuzu's father grabbed his samurai and pulled it mindlessly off its sheath. Kakuzu swore silently; did he really have to shed blood? Moreover, blood from his father's vessel? No matter how much he hated him, shedding blood was still wrong. However, even choice has limits.

Kakuzu jumped out of the window and hid. He had outrun his father and now he was searching for him and his sister. He set Mihoko on the ground and faced her. He held her face close, shushing her softly since she was still traumatized with her father's abusive grip. "Mihoko-chan, Mihoko-chan, listen to me." he whispered. "Listen, I'm going to take care of dad, all right? You, you go into my room through my window and go to grandpa's house, understand?"

Mihoko's lips quivered before she whimpered, "How about you? You will come with me, right, Niichan? You will live with me and grandma and grandpa, right?"

"Yes, yes, I will. Now I need you to be strong and go to my room. Now go. Go!" Kakuzu pecked his sister's forehead before she dashed to his room. That was when he felt a glass-like metal strike through his right shoulder. He screamed in agony and fell onto his knees.

"Not so strong anymore, are you, little rat?" his father growled, grabbing a handful of his hair coarsely. "Why do I have a son like you in the first place anyway? Your brother is much better; he listens to me and brings me money. What do you do? You can't even clean a bathroom right."

Struggling through the sharp pain, Kakuzu replied, "That's because…I don't want to live like this all my life. I don't want to grow as a fat-ass loser. I don't want to live by the shame." Kakuzu coughed, spluttering some blood to the decaying grass of his backyard.

"Shame? _I'm_ the one who live in shame and you're the cause of it! A giddy little rascal like you as my son…God, the neighbors are going to gossip about you a lot when they heard that you just offend your own father."

Kakuzu smirked, "If that's the case, then I have nothing to worry." Despite the injury on his right shoulder, Kakuzu managed to grab a kunai from his back pocket and stabbed it to his father's hand that grabbed his hair. He cried in pain and spontaneously released Kakuzu's hair.

"That's it!" he roared, "You're dead!" he swerved his sword and Kakuzu was too late to dodge…

"Run, Kakuzu!" Oniji shouted, blocking his father's arm without getting slashed by the sword. Rikako helped too; she jumped to her father's shoulders and blinded his eyes with her hands.

"Niisan? Neesan?" Kakuzu asked dazedly.

"Now, Kakuzu! Run! Run!" Oniji shouted.

Kakuzu nodded and got up to his feet. He stopped when Rikako called his name and turned back for the last time. "Take care of Mihoko-chan for us." He nodded again and ran to his room while his brother and sister stalled their hideous, bloodthirsty father from killing him.

The last thing he heard was his father screaming, "You'll pay, Kakuzu! You'll pay! You and your little sister!!!"

* * *

_Honestly speaking, I was frightened when he said he was going to pay me back. But for now, I have something much more important to do. I never knew what happened to Rikako and Oniji after I escaped. Were they killed? Thinking of them, I couldn't help but cry. I was wrong about them. I thought they were loyal to my father, but apparently they still have common sense. It was sad that my relationship with them didn't work so well. I guess their work impediment the growth of our relationship. It was not until that day that I realize how much I love them._

_I know my father was serious about chasing after me and Mihoko. So as I crawled under the tunnel, I stick two paper bombs three yards after the entrance from my room. I detonated them as soon as I exit the tunnel. Now there was no way he would follow us. Of course, he knew grandpa's house; that was why we moved to the northern outskirt of Takigakure. Few weeks later, I was registered as a ninja and received my first headband._

_You could say my life improved ever since I left that hell house. I saw more smiles coming from Mihoko's round face and I think I smiled more often too. I was—and still am—grateful for having such great grandparents. I'd probably have taken my own life already if they were abusive too, but, thank heavens, they were not. And I never know how to thank Rikako and Oniji's sacrifice. We may get separated, but we know our hearts still linked together._

* * *

**There you go! The first part of Kakuzu's childhood oneshot trilogy. He's such an old man, so it's normal if anybody would fantasize about his childhood. I have no idea whether he has siblings in the real timeline, but since Kishimoto-sensei killed him early, that only makes my life easier. Just to let you know, here he is not stitched yet. That part comes later. And, from my dreamy corner, I think he looks really cute that time.**

**Initially, I want to put the trilogy as chapters, but then it troubles the rating system. Anyway, by not putting them into chapters, it's easier for readers to read as they don't necessarily have to read all of them.**

**In the end, thank you for reading till this far. I'd really like to know what you think of this oneshot and my new style of writing which I'm going to use for the trilogy. Kogito out!**


	2. Mosaic of Youth

_Who knew a boy like me could run such a perfect life after what I've been through?_

_After escaping my father's abusive technique of raising children and live with my grandparents, I was registered as a ninja. And just like any other genin throughout the world, I was put to a team of three fellow genins plus one jounin sensei. My partners were both a boy and a girl. The boy, Tsukasa was his name, has an ash-grey hair and a pair of ultramarine eyes. He complained often, but he was not a chatty type of person. However, he was pretty slow at thinking and could be so dense at times that I often had to yell at him._

_The girl, Bion, has a sepia hair and a pair of forest green eyes. You could say she was the main fighter in our team, while Tsukasa worked as our shield and me as the healer. That didn't mean I did no fighting, though. And, just like her name, Bion has a beautiful voice when she hummed or especially when she sang._

_Then our sensei. Her name is Onaga and she was quite of an androgynous. She has a boyish haircut and she talked like a man does. The only thing that wasn't so boyish from her was her clothes. She was pretty weird and rough sometimes but her explanation was always clear and straightforward. And guess what, she was my grandfather's former student. I guess I shouldn't be surprised._

_We get along just fine. Of course, there was a few mouth fights, even once a fist fight between me and Tsukasa but overall we were tight. I trust them fully with my life; that was enough reason for me to let them hear my story._

_My life as a genin only lasted for a year. I successfully passed the chuunin test and get promoted together with Bion. Unfortunately, Tsukasa failed at the theory test. Onaga-sensei mercilessly taught him more theories for the next year's chuunin test. Meanwhile, Bion and I accomplished B and even A-rank missions. The next year, Tsukasa couldn't stop shedding tears because finally he had succeeded in the test and became a chuunin. And ever since becoming a chuunin, Tsukasa somehow had improved his field of knowledge. He didn't think as slow as he used to. Now the three of us were in the middle of the bridge to jounin rank._

* * *

"Here we are, people! Uruha Takoyaki! Yumm! I can't wait any longer! Let's strangle some octopus!" Onaga exclaimed merrily and entered the takoyaki bar, greeting her old friend which was also the chef in this bar.

"I was expecting she would treat us something different." Kakuzu sighed, shaking his head slowly as he followed his sensei into the brightly lit bar.

Bion giggled and rubbed his back comfortingly, "You know her. Takoyaki is her favorite food."

"I know. But don't I deserve something better?" he demanded.

"Quit complaining, Kakuzu." Tsukasa pushed him from the back, startling Kakuzu who almost fell. "Whatever Onaga-sensei picks, it always going to be delicious. Let's take our seat, shall we?"

"You obviously like Onaga-sensei, don't you?" Bion stated plainly. Kakuzu stared at her wide-eyed while Tsukasa suddenly lost balance and one of his legs failed to sustain his weight. Looking at his reaction, Bion smirked in satisfaction.

"Are you serious?! You like someone twice your age?" Kakuzu asked in disbelief.

"Don't ask!" Tsukasa snapped at him who had just started to chuckle. "And don't laugh either!"

Nevertheless, Kakuzu only managed to reduce the laugh into giggles which still annoy Tsukasa to no end. They sat on their reserved table (Onaga did that all the time), waiting for Onaga to arrive with their menu. Suddenly, Kakuzu's view was filled with fried sea creature stacked into a hideous tower. Kakuzu jumped when the plate of takoyaki landed and craned his head up to see his sensei's face-splitting smile.

"Happy birthday, Kakuzu! Here's my present!" Onaga patted his head and sat beside Tsukasa.

"Wow…" Kakuzu grabbed his chopsticks but still hesitated on eating the heap of octopi. "Thanks a lot, sensei, but…I don't think I can finish them all."

Onaga's eyes beamed and with enthusiasm, she demanded, "So can I have half of it?"

"Go ahead."

"Hurrah!!!" Without hesitation, Onaga sliced half of the stack and put them on her own plate. She started to chomp them down.

Kakuzu smiled wryly and whispered mainly to himself, "It's still too much for me…"

"Then let me help you." Bion offered. Kakuzu stared at her wide-eyed, surprised that she heard him whispering, but he smiled nonetheless and nodded, accepting her kind offer. The team ate silently (excluding Onaga) until Onaga decided to break the silence by asking Kakuzu:

"So, kid, remind me again: how old are you now?"

"Nineteen, Ma'am."

"God! Time sure flies really fast! Even the fastest lightning couldn't match this speed."

Bion's corner of her lips curled as she direct her eyes from Tsukasa, to her sensei, and lastly to Kakuzu, "It sure is. It feels just like yesterday when we first became a team, then we became chuunin, go through mostly lethal missions—"

"And Tsukasa and his slow processing mind!" Onaga added in voice much louder voice projection than Bion's softer one. Said boy's teammates started to chuckling and giggling while Tsukasa himself was flushing red with all the embarrassment.

"That too." Bion agreed, speaking between giggles. Then she continued, "Then here we are, celebrating Kakuzu's nineteenth birthday. I can't believe how strong our team is. After all these years and we still can eat takoyaki. It's just…wonderful…"

The atmosphere warmed as Bion's comrades pulled a warm smile. Kakuzu circled his arm around Bion's back and Onaga did the similar with Tsukasa.

"It's a great honor to work with you people."

* * *

_Life did get better. Not only mine, but my little sister's too. Back when she hasn't understood so many things about the world, she was our brutal father's favorite chew toy. All hits and punches directed to her—originally, if I didn't sacrifice myself. I could tell she was heavily traumatized. Well, who wouldn't? Moving out with our grandparents was a correct choice for her sake. She grew up fine now; she didn't starve anymore, didn't get bruised anymore…and obviously a lot happier. It was for her I became a ninja on the first place._

_Meanwhile, my grandfather worked as a senior doctor in Takigakure Public Hospital in order to earn extra money while I was absent from home due to missions. Known as a dedicated ANBU back in his younger days, it wasn't hard for him to earn a job, despite that he was supposed to be retiring. Nevertheless, my grandfather was still strong enough and he personally preferred to keep active._

_He always said to me: "One's age is not determined by time, but by health."_

_He was ABSOLUTELY right._

_No matter how big your numbers are, if you can run, farm, work, and jump around, then you're young. Old people are people who can barely do anything anymore and people who are sick and dying. So even if you're just ten years old, if you spent most of your life depending on medicines, wheelchairs, and whatever it is you found in the hospital—you are old._

* * *

Standing near the shoe rack, Mihoko settled the wooden walking sandals on her gradually growing feet. Unlike her brother, she didn't, and didn't want to, become a ninja. Although she was aware that it was a cruel world outside the front yard of her house, she better off knowing basic self-defense than becoming a fighter and chose to become a normal person instead. She tapped the front of her sandals, adjusting it to place with the back of her right foot when the familiar loud footsteps advancing at her direction. Gleefully, she turned around, flipping her black loosely braided hair harmoniously with her movement.

With a casual warm smile, her brother towered her petite figure. She smiled broadly at him—the smile that brightened Kakuzu's day every time he sees her. Her buoyant voice chimed, "Good morning, Oniisan! Are you going out?"

Slowly, her brother nodded, "Yes, Tsukasa will come over and then we'll head off to the training grounds. What about you? Where are you going at this time of the day?"

"I'm going to a friend's house. I won't be long, I'll be back before sunset." the thirteen-year-old girl promised. She had to promise every time she went out of the house. Kakuzu was a little bit too protective of her and unless she reassured him, he would never let her go out from the house except with their grandmother or grandfather.

Never getting tired of the same ritual every day, Kakuzu embraced his sister. Every time was the same: he wanted to restrain his sister but he knew very well he has no right to do so. Today, he decided to give Mihoko an extra tight embrace, compelling his much shorter sister to stifle against his tall figure's chest.

"Niisan—let me go!" Mihoko forcefully pushed her brother off of her. "You believe the rumors too much, Oniisan! It's not like it's going to get near my friend's house anyway! Trust me…I'll be fine." She smiled to enhance her reassuring words and to fight Kakuzu's skeptic drooping eyebrows.

"Yeah, Kakuzu, trust her." Tsukasa's voice interjected, startling the siblings. "Seriously, man, you have to let her go once in a while. Maybe you should try _not_ spying her this time." Tsukasa smirked, somewhat amused with Kakuzu's bewildered expression and Mihoko shooting dagger-sharp glares at her brother.

"You've been spying me?!" Mihoko asked in disbelief.

"I can't resist." Kakuzu replied quickly.

"Well, Tsukasa-oniisan was right. Try to let me go!" she hurried off, leaving the young men at the front door one sniggering and the other one befuddled.

Kakuzu crossed his arms, "How lovely," Kakuzu muttered sarcastically, "Now she's mad at me. It was all your fault." he laid blame on his friend with cold yet bitter tone. Already saying his goodbyes to his grandparents, Kakuzu strode off to the training grounds. Tsukasa trailed behind him, incredulous.

"What? How could it be my fault?" Tsukasa protested.

"Because your big mouth just had to cascade everything out!"

* * *

_That was Tsukasa, all right. Another downside of him was, occasionally, he just couldn't keep his mouth shut. That was another argument bringer among the both of us. God, I just realize I tend to befriend people who are the worst secret keeper in the universe…_

_We usually time our practice for four hours. If we have more time, we might as well extend the practice hours up to seven—depends on our stamina. In this particular day, Tsukasa and I sparred for nearly five and a half hours. Drenching with sweat and the skies were turning crimson, I offered Tsukasa to eat with my family, since my house was closer from the training grounds._

_However, today was different._

_Instead of smelling the sweet, piquant scent of my grandmother's cooking, both grandpa and grandma waited for my return right in front of the entrance. Immediately, I knew something was awfully wrong._

* * *

"Kakuzu, where is your sister?" Grandpa asked. His face was oddly full with more wrinkles than usual. Those wrinkles, as Kakuzu had realized, were not just sexagenarian wrinkles but blended with frowns too. Moreover, with his grandfather asking about Mihoko, Kakuzu's heart sank.

"She's not home yet?" Kakuzu asked, voice quarter way to trembling with fear.

Kakuzu's grandmother shook her head. She was putting a gesture that Kakuzu knew well was a sign of worry. Her eyes were on its way to shedding tears; her lips were quivering. Those body languages were enough for Kakuzu to get alarmed. Grinding his lower teeth against the upper row, Kakuzu sharply turned and dashed in search for his sister. Tsukasa willingly and voluntarily followed his friend and helped him.

Tsukasa used his heightened sense of smelling and picked up familiar scents from the rooftops of Takigakure while Kakuzu made his way running to Mihoko's friend's house. Seeing his bewildered expression, Mihoko's friend's family answered honestly: that Mihoko didn't come to their house and play with their daughter. Forgetting politeness and good attitude, Kakuzu leaped skyward, startling the on-searching Tsukasa.

Ever patiently, Tsukasa grabbed Kakuzu's left upper arm. Wildly, Kakuzu yanked his arm back, growling, "Let me go! I have to find Mihoko-chan!"

Ignoring his growling, Tsukasa caught Kakuzu's upper arm again and put more power on the hold so his best friend would listen to him. "That's the thing! I've traced her scent! I can lead us to her place!" he replied as sharply as possible in order to balance with Kakuzu briskness.

Kakuzu's muscles flexed to stationary and he nodded in acknowledgement. "Show me." he muttered. That didn't mean that his fears have ceased just by knowing that his friend picked up the scent of his sister. No—the fear still spreads further.

The two youths arrived at an old, worn out workshop filled with the scent of the rotten wood, damp moss and… "Blood." Tsukasa gasped, "Her blood, I can smell her blood!" The alarm in Tsukasa's voice woke up the same Fear Poltergeist that had been engulfing Kakuzu. They both dashed to find the young girl and her brother found her lying sideways on the cold rock floor.

Kakuzu's sound tape jumbled up with his esophagus as he saw the state his sister was in. It was not until he rapidly approached her that he could scream out her name in sheer horror. More horrifyingly, her skin was no longer the soft shade of ochre but it was a horrendous mélange of red, blue and cream. Her eyes were as vacant as a dry mountain well. Her wrists were a pair of brimming plastic pack of strawberry syrups.

Dropping on his kneecaps, Kakuzu salvaged the body of his dearest sister, shutting her cosmically vacuum eyes. Kakuzu turned into a statue of a boy who lost someone dear to him with perfect human-like colors. His tears had a seriously hideous traffic, causing them to stay back in the gland. Tsukasa sympathetically stepped closer toward his friend only to halt and shriek due to a sudden agony that struck his spine and downwards.

Startled by the distress call from his friend behind him, he automatically whisked around, meeting the slightly wrinkly monster that almost chopped off his arm if he didn't defend himself eight years ago. Kakuzu's jade orbs showed the fullest of its form as the eye sockets expanded.

_Same_ insanity—_more_ cruelty—_different_ weapon—_new_ target.

"Missed me, Kakuzu?" asked his father.

The mention of his name spoken by his voice made it sound as if he was a rat. Kakuzu arose, still stricken with grieve, and faced his father (or which he prefer to thought of as _former_ father). "Why are you here, _Sadahige_?" the nineteen-year-old youth asked sourly, vengeful poison dripping out to his tongue as he hissed the accursed name. He refused to call him 'father' or 'dad'. Those were taboo words to be used on the mid-aged man, up until this very day.

"I just want to see my children and give them a valuable lesson. I can do that, now can't I?" he replied with an abysmal smile striking across his face.

"We are. _NOT_. Your children!" Kakuzu snarled. "Moreover, you hurt my friend!"

"This albino? Your _friend?_" Passing through a husky squeak, a wicked laughter resonated from the middle-aged man followed by an uncouth kick on the injured Tsukasa's side.

Kakuzu's wolf side was roused, causing him to snarl at the abomination of curse and nightmare. "At least unlike you, I have someone I can fully trust on!" With a bellow of rage, Kakuzu charged at Sadahige, striking two kunais to clash with Sadahige's butcher's knife he used to strike at Tsukasa's spine.

Kakuzu's daily-trained agility overpowered Sadahige. Effectively using quick moves, Kakuzu succeeded blowing powerful kicks and Earth chakra-enhanced fists. Backing away after a nose-crushing clout blown to Sadahige, Kakuzu used the chance to gouge his kunai to his flesh; he aimed the eyes. But much to his surprise, Sadahige sacrificed his palm to block the kunai's sharp edge.

Grinning maniacally, Sadahige dropped his buther's knife to another hand and swung it to slice Kakuzu's side of his abdomen. The youth evaded it just in time but was a little bit too late to evade its two centimeters cut on his side. Taken aback by the pain of the blow, Kakuzu held his side. His blood gushing madly from it. Due to the momentary disperse of thoughts; Kakuzu was late to dodge the next fatal blow to the chest.

A shrill scream boomed from Sadahige's mouth as not only he was counterattacked, but his slicing arm (the same arm he used to block Kakuzu's kunai) was malevolently punctured by a Nagamaki pole arm which blade was four feet long and its haft was three feet long. It was Tsukasa generation-passing weapon. Kicking him on the side, Tsukasa landed sturdily beside Kakuzu.

"Is your back alright?" Kakuzu asked between hisses.

"It hurts like hell, but I can handle it." Tsukasa answered, also hissing due to the pain. "Had he pierced me any closer, I'd be paralyzed already."

"At least we still can move, right?"

The two friends braced their weapons and without further comments, they assaulted Sadahige simultaneously with fierce and fast-paced attacks. Knowing that their opponent was not a ninja, they decided not to use ninjutsu or taijutsu. They would use genjutsu, but unfortunately, none of them could use it despite that their knowledge of the hypnotism jutsu was quite vast for nineteen-year-olds. Even though they outnumbered the murderous man, they were not as well-shaped as him. Their deep injuries on one of their most important body part had slowed them down slightly, giving a number of advantages to Sadagihe. Plus, Sadahige still has another good, unscathed arm.

At one time, when Kakuzu was about to give his hardest punch, his injury on the side seemed to widen by half a centimeter. Although not much, but the muscle-tearing effect successfully blurred Kakuzu's focus. His fist missed and in return, Sadahige used the chance to right hooked Kakuzu on his ribs, fracturing some of the ends. As he collapsed backwards, he sputtered a handful of red drops. Curling on the ground, he was unaware and unprepared for the next attack.

"No father needs a son like you. You are a shame; a disgrace! You're not even loyal, unlike your older siblings. But, ah, they're gone too now." Sadahige rambled, raising his butcher's knife for a deathly blow.

Kakuzu's heart panged against his nearly-broken ribcage. Negative speculations ran marathon in his brain. Rikako and Oniji…could they really have died long ago? Senses distorting, Kakuzu couldn't tell there was a single tear track on the side of his face.

The butcher's knife rose to the foul-smelled air. Its sharpened end glimmered in preparation of its gory victor, unscathed by the odor. Sadahige's arm muscles tightened as he readied himself to end his traitor son's life. He wore his devious grin, like a tuxedo worn to the parties. At long last, he swerved the knife swiftly. In the matter of seconds, the knife sliced and…

Shed blood.

Tsukasa's blood.

Able to defend his friend, Tsukasa was unable to save himself. He was not killed yet, but his injuries had just got worse. A thick red line was drawn on his neck, just a little lower from his direct esophagus and trachea. Had he not forced the slicing hand lower, he would have been decapitated—something Kakuzu would really hated to happen to his best friend. The liquid drained as fast as the wastes in the sewers; Tsukasa was delirious and the grip on Sadahige's arm loosened rapidly.

Horror stricken, Kakuzu shouted, "TSUKASA!" Still in the hands of pain, Kakuzu crawled closer to hold his friend. However, he was unable to as his ex-father had stepped on his leg, preventing him from going any further. He looked at the frightening mid-aged man with horror, now too weak to fight back. He hacked as he rolled to his back after a piercing kick.

Sadahige knelt down to get a closer look at his son, his knife held firmly in his fat hand. The cold flat metal side of the knife kissed Kakuzu's cheek. Using his injured hand, Sadahige made Kakuzu's mouth opened slightly, enough for the knife to slip and placed on the corners of his mouth. At which point Kakuzu's goose bumps didn't just stood, they quivered madly—as madly as the earthquake shaking from his spine.

Sadahige enjoyed seeing his ex-son shivering and sweating cold, he enjoyed it more when Kakuzu involuntarily whimpered. His grin widened, "See this grin, boy? I don't see this grin anywhere on your face in my whole life. You need to put a smile on that face! Here, let daddy make you smile…"

Kakuzu's corners extended; the floor was soon painted in red and all its sibling shades; the ceiling bounced ear-splitting scream and out to the broken window. Sadahige had made his son smiled wider—or should we say _frown_ wider. He was not content yet—this boy didn't deserve to live, he thought, better get rid of it. Ceremoniously with his evil laugh, he lacerated here and there on the boy's body as well as absorbing the hard music resonating from the throat belonged the boy he tormented. By the time Sadahige began to rip out a red tetragon off of him, Kakuzu had already lost his senses. He couldn't feel pain anymore; his throat ached horribly from simultaneous screams; he loss way too much body fluid and his consciousness dissipating promptly. His father said another few things but all sounded like a moose calling for a mate or a whale doing the same thing. He never learned that his ex-father tore more tetragons and other polygonal shapes.

The voices turned shrill and he heard _zip! _and _zap!_ coming from above him. The demonic figure of his former father showed that he was hemorrhaging severely. He paid no heed on what might have hurt him. His attention floated far from the world backwards to his memories…promises…and faces…

* * *

...

_There was really…not much I can remember…_

_Everything was dark; everything was gloomy. I was sure I was dead. The first thing I hoped was to see my little sister's face once again. Yet it wasn't her I saw…_

_It was a memory of her._

_The last thing she said to me was of rage. She was angry because I tailed her like a vulture preying a dying zebra. I understand if she was angry. What I was worried (and still am) about was she didn't get the chance to say a proper farewell for me. Our relationship ended with a sharp tone fly. I felt guilty too… I wish that I could still explain to her about my actions and my eternal feelings for her. I want to call her name one last time…_

_Mihoko…_

_Now she was taken away from me by a collaboration of our former father with the Fates and Death himself. That Sadahige jerk…he was out there somewhere. I lost against him. I've _failed_ to take my revenge!_

_In my whole life, there's no other person I desperately wanted to kill but him._

_But how could I? I was weak and I haven't the foggiest clue where he was. Well, not until my grandfather told me…_

* * *

The nose was always the first of the five senses to work first once a ninja was awake. The smell of herbs mixed with alcohol and other chemically-blended substances ponged into his nostrils. Immediately, his nerves could feel stinging pain on his cheeks. The sting shot to his brain in less than one nanosecond, causing his remaining senses to alert. He could see his surroundings well now; all white and…grandfather was there, expecting him with his expression as calm as ever, as if he knew he would wake few seconds in advance. He came to notice that he was grasping his hand quite firmly.

"Grand…pa…" Kakuzu hoarsely called him. The pain on his cheeks disabled him from speaking too loudly but at least he could speak loud and clear enough to be heard. However, he was still too weak to move.

"I'm here, child." his grandfather soothed him. He waited for him to say more…

"What…happened…" His words came sluggish and his voice husky and dry.

His grandfather sighed—a sign of dismay—and Kakuzu disliked it. "You were halfway skinned, boy, and your mouth was sliced. That man is sure is ill-minded. It's a great blessing that you don't turn to be like him, Kakuzu…" His calloused yet sturdy hand gently stroked the youth's forehead.

"Mihoko-chan…"

The grandfather's face grew somber and it grew more as he shook his head, "She—she didn't make it." If Kakuzu were healthier, he could feel the mild tremble in his voice. He continued, "She had lost all the blood in her vessels for a long time, son. I presume she had died not long after the two of you—you and your friend—left the house. She did not make it to her friend's house, am I right?" The elderly man needed no answer: the weeping of his only one left grandchild had confirmed his assumption.

Kakuzu ignored the stinging and soreness from his injuries. He just lost his most precious human being in the universe; anyone would weep. With his grandfather's forehead pressed against him, he continued to weep and the sniffles could be heard throughout the hospital.

...

After three days, Kakuzu was capable of sitting but not standing nor walking. His grandmother visited him every day, bringing him lunch. As he would expected, his grandmother's cooking tasted less piquant that usual. That was because there was no Mihoko who cheered her up whenever she was cooking. No child that gets the first taste and praises her cooking—not anymore. Kakuzu decided not to mention his sister too much as he knew it would ache the elder woman's heart.

His grandfather had explained what he had done to him while he passed out. He had implanted into him organic black tendrils. They were used as a supporter for his severely irreplaceable muscles and to guard his vital organs without strangling them. The tendrils were even capable of shifting the locations of his organs but only to a certain limit. It also coped with Kakuzu's healing chakra so Kakuzu can stitch someone's wound in case of great need. His grandfather also explained that Kakuzu now could salvage other people's organs too and make them his own. He also revealed that he had two hearts: one that was older and his original heart, and the other one that was much younger which he reluctantly accepted from a young man who wanted to commit suicide few years ago. But he warned him one thing:

"You may only steal one's heart only when you are in a great need of survival, when you have someone dear to protect, and/or your goals are yet to be achieved. I will not allow you to use it for greedy matters such as power. That one you must achieve in another way."

The tendrils helped his skin to remain attached and closed the horrendous gap on the corners of his mouth. In a way, it also made him looked slightly 'stuffier' than he used to be.

Much to his grudge's joy, Sadahige was caught and sentenced to spend the rest of his life in prison. The crueler part of him wanted him to get executed, but the softer side of him said that was enough—at least he knew he wouldn't be able to ruin his life anymore.

It was Tsukasa who was in his concern. He hadn't heard about him ever since his grandfather told him that he would be mute for a couple of months or more. He also stated that the giant gush on his back might not disappear over time, but it won't affect his legs. Kakuzu wanted to see him and as his mind wandered, his other teammate knocked on his door.

"Kakuzu!" Bion squealed and hugged him tightly. Despite a little bit of pain, Kakuzu hugged her back. "I was so worried about you! They said you were tortured by a homicidal bounty!"

"Bion…" Kakuzu breathed. He tried not to speak of it too loudly. "That bounty was my father. The man I told you in my story…"

Kakuzu looked to the ground, Bion told herself, and he was feeling ashamed. Any child would when they confess to the whole world that their parents were a high-priced bounty searched around the world, D.O.A. It was no exception for Kakuzu, even though he had shouted with all the air in his lungs that he had long abandoned their relationship. Yet, genetics don't lie.

Breaking the ice, Bion tugged Kakuzu's wrist. "Let's check Tsukasa." she offered, smiling softly.

Kakuzu nodded and smiled back. Riding on a wheelchair, Kakuzu and Bion went to Tsukasa's room. He didn't do anything; just sitting in front of the window like a retiring old-timer. As he heard the squeaking wheels, he turned around, half-wondering half-expecting. He turned around along with his chair so that he faced Kakuzu.

Biting a little of his lips, Kakuzu decided on what to talk. After a short while, he decided to start with simple conversations. "So…how're you, Tsukasa?"

Grabbing a blank-paged book and a graphite stick (Tsukasa sketched using raw graphite for leisure), Tsukasa wrote, _"Can't speak, but overall I'm alive. You?"_

"I'm alive…but certainly not well enough." Kakuzu answered pessimistically.

"_Nah,"_ Tsukasa replied, _"soon, we'll be sparring and jumping from rooftop to rooftop again."_

Kakuzu chuckled bitterly and, having enough of humble conversations, he jumped up into saying, "I'm so sorry." much to his friends' surprise. "You had to suffer this because of me. It—it was a personal business—you shouldn't have got involved into this." Kakuzu's fists were clenching so hard he could feel his nails digging into the skin. He sniveled and Bion's arms accompanied him. Staggering, Tsukasa walked towards his friend.

He knelt before him and wrote on his book again, _"Idiot…I chose to get involved. I wanted to help."_

Kakuzu's eyebrows drawn backwards. He hung his head low and muttered very softly, "Thank you…Tsukasa…"

The day was on its way to end its fourth cycle. Only six cycles left and Kakuzu was allowed to go home by the doctor—which was also his own grandfather. Staring at the last bright light of the day, Kakuzu's mind flew towards the sun and it seemed to vainly reach the sun as the giant fire sphere. It stopped following the sun when Bion sat next to him, holding his hand.

"I'm sorry about your sister." she said softly so as not to destroy Kakuzu's mourning moment. "I know how much she's worth for you."

Kakuzu didn't answer—what to say? As much as he wanted to deny the fact that his sister was utterly and clearly dead, the fact never lies. He tilted his head sideways, towards Bion, and the first thing he noticed was bandage. "What's happened to your left hand?"

"Uhm, that man hurt my wrist after I attacked him. Maybe I would end up like you two if I didn't play rough with him."

Kakuzu reached for Bion's bandaged hand and caressed it. "Even this shouldn't happen. You should've stayed out of my business, Bion."

Bion briskly yanked her hand out of Kakuzu's bigger hand. And although she wasn't really angry, but Kakuzu could tell there was a sensible amount of irritation in her voice. "The truth is, Kakuzu, you should _let_ someone to stay in your business! We're trying to help—plus we're teammates—friends! You can't finish all of your troubles alone, Kakuzu—remember who carried you out of the house you used to live when you were kid! If your grandparents weren't willing to help you, God knows what would have happened to you!"

At which point Kakuzu whipped his head and looked at her straight. He rejoined, "It's not the matter of whether or not _letting_ you _in_! It's the matter of whether or not you'll _make it out alive!_ Sure, I'll let you in anytime, but not when there's a murderous man like him that I've to deal with! I almost lost two people there, Bion! I've already lost my sister—that's one, my older siblings are dead too—that makes three, then, and Tsukasa almost fell into the same pit! I _don't want_ that to happen _especially_ to you!"

Kakuzu winced and hissed—the bellowing hurt his nearly-split jaws. Since he finished emphasizing his point of let-in-not-let-in principles, he massaged his aching jaws, turning his head away from Bion's natural green eyes.

It was then he felt extra slimmer fingers fondling the stitches on the sides of his face while the other five fingers were resting on his shoulder. Kakuzu raised his head to meet her green eyes again and found that she was smiling the softest he had witnessed. "That's…the sweetest thing a man had ever said to me." With a gentle pull, she brought Kakuzu to a tender kiss that wouldn't affect the stitched wounds painfully. It didn't take long for Kakuzu to process and wrapped his arms securely around her and brought her even closer.

* * *

**God oh God…thank you for helping me finishes this oneshot…and thank you for sending me to my great parents. I just can't imagine if Sadahige is my father… This story took painful and busy days to finish. How many days has it been since the first one? Ah, well…. Anyway, this is the first sadistic and tragic story I've ever wrote. Huh, I should reward myself for making such a breakthrough. I swear I myself almost gagged writing the torture seen. What was written in the draft was actually far more detailed than this one but I censored it so that hemaphobics (people who are afraid of blood) could still read it without having too much trauma…or not…but I doubt any hemaphobic will watch Naruto anyway if they're that afraid of blood. Naruto is all bloody, especially the scene where Hidan was decapitated by Asuma. Now there's only one more part to go! The Adulthood!**

**The quote said by Kakuzu gramps in the beginning of the story is based on true events of my life. There was this time where there's a salesman praising my late dad for being so energetic despite in his sixties. Then my dad said something about he always feels young. Then after that he and I had a harmonious discussion about the subject. Ah…good times…**

**I digress as usual; let's end this, shall we? Thank you for reading this far! Please click the button below and send me your review/praise/criticism. Oh yes…I'm always open for criticism. CRITICISM! NOT FLAMES!**


	3. Collage of Maturity

_I never knew rehabilitation could be _this _painful._

_The rehab was all done at home. The walking process was the most painful of all. It was as if my legs won't walk anymore, despite that now they have extra reinforcements. On the contrary, my arms did just fine. In fact, they worked just as they used to be. I also had difficulties in eating and I mostly can't digest solid food, except vegetables, and the apple had to be juiced in order for me to consume it. And…apple juice doesn't taste so good for me. Ugh…the worst would be carrot and tomato._

_Enough about food. And I was not the only one who went through rehabilitation. My friend, Tsukasa, went through this too. However, unlike me who took months, Tsukasa's rehab only lasted a week. Well, give or take in one more week. But the scar on his back seemed to remain even until his old days. It was a pretty bad scar, I'm telling you. And his voice came back! Last time, his neck was nearly split into two. He couldn't talk for the next few days, but now he could. And as soon as he was able to do so, the first thing he said to me was, "Oh, Kakuzu! Can't you walk already? Or do you need a cane?" Good thing my arms worked, so I gave him a memorable smack on the head._

_Nevertheless, he was one of the people I know who gave me the support I need to recover. The number one supporter was my grandfather. Of course, he was my doctor too. He was the one who monitored my recovery and helped me in case I need it. And the second supporter would be Bion, my girl teammate._

_Unlike me, she enjoyed my rehab. No, not because she enjoyed seeing me wincing and groaning. That doesn't sound like her at all. She enjoyed spoon-feeding me! She came everyday just to do that certain thing to me—although I could tell she wanted to do more than just treating me like a baby._

* * *

Kakuzu scowled upon seeing his own face in the bathroom. He tilted his head sideways and rubbed the stitches on the sides of his face. They looked horrible, he thought, and they made him to look like a zombie. Zombie of a once fair young man. He didn't really mind with the stitches on the rest of his body; he could still cover those. But the ones on his face…

Kakuzu jumped when the door opened and his grandfather walked in. He sighed, "Geez, Grandpa, you scared me."

Grandpa chuckled lightly, "Did you think I might be a girl? Relax, Kakuzu, you see I'm not. Now, have you finished taking a bath?" The old man walked towards the wooden bath tub and got undressed without waiting for Kakuzu's answer. As he checked the heat of the water, he stared back at his grandson, who was still doing the same thing when he walked in. "You're not ugly, son." he said, much to Kakuzu's surprise.

"Yeah, but I'm horrible." Kakuzu replied pessimistically. "No one would like me."

"What makes you say that, huh? Just because your face isn't as…normal as most people, doesn't mean you're completely ugly. Just look at me, son."

Kakuzu stared at his grandfather and noticed the stitches on his chest. His eyes bulged; he had no idea what his grandfather had been through.

"And you still think no women liked me? What about your grandmother? She's been with me ever since I was twenty-seven and she never complained on how I look."

"That's because you have no stitches on your face, Grandpa. Unlike me…"

Kakuzu's grandfather sighed and as he dipped to the tub, he said one last time before Kakuzu exited the bathroom, "Trust me, son. It's not how you look that matters."

Kakuzu listened, but he decided to ignore the last statement. Before he completely unattached his eyes from his grandfather's figure, he muttered, "Good evening, grandpa." Solemnly, he strolled to his room but after a few long steps, he stopped to a young woman's voice.

"Your grandfather's right, you know. You shouldn't be too bothered with how you look." Bion interjected, her voice striking through the silence of sundown. Kakuzu watched her tall figure walking to the empty space in front of him. Seeing that her eyes were looking straight at his face, Kakuzu whipped his head, anything so that Bion need not to see his horrendous face. But being a persistent girl was she, Bion placed her long fingers on Kakuzu's face and softly forced him to look at her—which he found quite difficult.

Bion chuckled lightly, plastering her lips on Kakuzu's. "You sure have problems with self-confidence. It's not your face that determines of who you are." Her hands slowly slid down to Kakuzu's chest, and since the young man had just come out of the bathroom, the chest was still bare.

"Is that why you're still sticking around me?" Kakuzu asked.

The end of Bion's mouth curved upwards into a lustful smirk. She circled her arms around his neck as his arms around her waist. Their faces enclosed for an eternity of passion.

* * *

_It's obvious. We loved each other._

_(Well, excuse my lack of 'poetic' words. I am not designed to be a poet.)_

_So in no time, we were in a relationship. Our relationship went for a long time and most of the time we were what you call as going steady. Of course, there was one or two times when we argued, but since we've known each other ever since genin, we quickly and easily reconciled. I guess, you could say that as an advantage. Or the balancing weight between my tragic childhood and the current life. I couldn't possibly live in an all dreadful life, could I?_

_And for some reason I grew. Grew as in physically grew. I don't why, but my height suddenly towered. I, who used to be 175 cm, grew into 185. That was a huge growth for someone who had passed the growing stage. My head bumped to the front door frame if I didn't watch myself. Back then, people were shorter. I was probably a genetic revolution._

_So that was the beginning. It took me, what, six years until I was convinced that I want to build a brand new family together with the love of my life. Actually, we had talked about it three years earlier but I had my own concerns. One of them being about our children's welfare. I suddenly had this fear that I carried my biological father's berserk genes. Then all those sour memories bombarded me like crazy. What if—what if they suffer like I did?_

_But Bion always knew how to calm me down. Unlike me, she's always optimistic. She had convinced me hundreds of times already that I can't even count them with my fingers. She convinced me that I won't become my father. She said I'm too different from my father. At that point, we both made a promise._

_A promise that was beautiful. Beautiful—but blind. We didn't think about the consequences at that time. We thought it wasn't necessary. We thought, at that time, our life will go just like those fairy tales. But that was where our mistake lies._

_Fairy tales are not the Holy Bible._

_They are no testaments._

_They are no guidance._

_They are…tales. Stories. Fictions made by idealistic visionaries._

_What comes after the marriage is the pregnancy. And what comes after pregnancy is the birth. Just a year after our marriage, Bion gave birth to a healthy son. My son. He was a unique combination of me and Bion. I never knew it would look like this. He didn't have my unusual-looking eyes (having a red sclera instead of white) and the shade of green was just as dark as his mother's. The hair, though, was as black as mine._

_I named him Kiyohei. It means 'gallant soldier'. That didn't mean I expect him to be a bloodthirsty fighter, though. Gallant and bloodthirsty are two different words with different meanings. What made him much more unique was that he had this birth mark on the left lower jaw. I hope that birth mark might come in handy someday._

* * *

"Ow! Kiyo-kun, get off!" Kakuzu playfully told his son to dismount from his previously lying down stomach. He sat up and before his five-year-old son had time to escape, he caught him in his much stronger arms. They both giggled and laugh as they rebelled against each other. At this point, Kakuzu reigned over the dominance.

"Tousan! Let me go!" Kiyohei giggled, squirming in his father's arms. He tried to push and heaved and even a little kick but Kakuzu wouldn't let him go.

"Not until you say sorry!" Kakuzu teased him.

"Alright! Alright! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Kiyohei apologized to him lightheartedly in-between laughter. He slid off from Kakuzu's forceful embrace after his father loosened his arms. Tired of laughing and struggling, Kiyohei lounged on his father's thighs. "Whew…" he whistled.

"Tired much?" Kakuzu loomed over the little boy; a teasing smirk crossed his stitched face.

Grinning innocently, Kiyohei answered, "Tousan is so strong."

"You have to be stronger than me if you want to beat me, kid." Kakuzu ruffled his son's hair.

"I will become strong! I'm going to be stronger than you! You'll see!" Kiyohei bragged—a childish and harmless brag. His optimistic bragging brought a soft caring smile to his parents' faces. "If I'm strong, I can take care of my baby brother!"

Bion giggled at her child's innocence. "Honey, how do you know it's going to be a baby brother? What if it's a sister?" she asked, rubbing her belly that had been bloating for four months now.

"That's fine, because I'm going to protect her too!"

Kakuzu smirked while his wife giggled. Ruffling the child's hair again, Kakuzu remarked, "That's one big dream you have. I kind of like it."

The smiling, the giggling, and the laughing only lasted for a few seconds as the two adult ninjas (Bion being a former ninja) caught the presence of a few special infantry Takigakure ninjas. Kakuzu had had a dislike in their presence. Not only they often disrupt his quality time, but they were also besieged in some unfriendly aura. As if they were born and raised to kill. Kakuzu especially loathed this aura when Kiyohei was with him. Not to mention that the special infantry ninjas' faces were half or three-quarterly covered with indigo cloth, leaving only eyes, nostrils, and mouth exposed.

Seeing the cloth-bandaged men, Kiyohei seek protection near his father who stood in order to talk with the ninjas. Without looking away from the leader of the special infantry, Kakuzu ushered his son to hold on to his mother. Kakuzu stepped towards them and acting polite, he asked, "Anything I can help with, gentlemen—" he spotted two kunoichi on the back, "—and ladies?"

"Kakuzu, grandson of medic ninja, Gohiko?" asked the leader in his deep baritone voice sternly. Kakuzu knew this voice too well, yet he never even once saw the real face of the speaker—not that he cared.

"Yes, that would be me. Don't you know me long enough, Jou?" Kakuzu tilted his head slightly. He knew the name, but he didn't know the face. Although he was pretty sure this ninja, the leader of the special infantry, Jou, was still his junior.

"Identity notification etiquette. Enough said. Junshou wishes to speak to you on the double. We're here to escort you." Jou announced the means of his arrival ingenuously.

"What's the occasion?" Kakuzu raised an eyebrow, confused of the matter that seemed to be different from the previous callings. Moreover, this Junshou had just been elected two years ago. During those two years, Kakuzu never got a direct order from the Junshou. Kakuzu wasn't the type to lead a team—at least not yet, not now.

"We are not told. Now please, come with us."

Before leaving with the special infantry squad, Kakuzu turned to his wife and child. Bion heard everything, but just like Kakuzu, she was confused with the whole sudden call factor. She placed her hands on her husband's shoulders and stared at him, worriedly. "I don't have a good feeling, Kakuzu. Everything is so chary."

"I know. Now I need you to put your guard up. Take care of Kiyohei and the baby. I'll be right back." Kakuzu pecked his wife before kneeling in front of his son. "I'm going. Take care of your mother."

"You're going home, right, Tousan?" Kiyohei grabbed his father's hand which then cupped his small face.

"Of course I will." Kakuzu smiled, but compared to before the squad arrived, it was less warm and less sincere. If only Kiyohei was a few years older, he would apprehend that the smile also contained a significant amount of doubt.

Kakuzu decided to zip his mouth throughout the short journey to the Junshou's office. He found it comfortable; anyway, none of these ninjas were friendly chatterboxes. He might need the talking energy for later. He had a feeling there would be an argument going. He may be right, he may be wrong.

Kakuzu stood still, waiting for the man whose face wrapped in brown cloth to rise up from his seat and address him. The Junshou did as what he had expected. Kakuzu sensed an aura that caused him to feel unease. He did not avert his gaze as the Junshou slowly walked down towards him.

"You call for me, Junshou?" Kakuzu asked.

A smile tugged on the Junshou's exposed lips. Kakuzu blinked his eyes and then expand their size as he sensed more than just uneasiness from the smile. "Yes. Yes, I do. In fact, I've longed to see you."

"Longed to see me?" Kakuzu wondered. "Why?"

The smile crept and it continued to extend sideways. It looked innocent—somehow too innocent that it bothered Kakuzu so dreadfully. Kakuzu couldn't help but to grew suspicious. "Because it has been a long time since the last time we both met. When you left, you were barely taller than me. Now look at you…so much taller than last time. And surely your face has a big difference."

Kakuzu gulped; the lump in his throat had difficulties plunging inside. "Do we…know each other, sir?" Kakuzu asked, one eye squinting unsurely.

"No need to be polite with me since we're private. And, yes, we do know each other. We _knew_ each other too well." Again, the heartfelt smile that wasn't so heartfelt stretched across the Junshou's cloth-wrapped face.

"Why do I have this bad feeling?" Kakuzu said out loud. He grimaced at the village leader's chuckle. It was light, friendly, yet it was eerie at the same time for the stitched man. The bad feeling had just gone worse. "Tell me who you are. It's impossible for me to recognize you when you have your face concealed. Moreover, you said yourself we haven't meet each other for a long time, so I might…" Kakuzu trailed off, eyes as big as the black hole somewhere in the vast galaxy.

While Kakuzu talked, the Junshou untied the cloth and stripped it off of his face. Slowly, starting from his chin, his true face revealed right in front of his subject in which thence caused the bulging of the eyes and the serious frazzled gaping. In addition, Kakuzu also had to gasp in utter shock while the leader just smiled innocently.

The hair.

The eyes.

The skin.

The mouth.

The _smile_, especially.

Now Kakuzu remember but unfortunately, he seemed to have an arduous time to digest what he was seeing directly in front of his eyes. One of the people whom he thought had ascended to the heavens. Someone to whom he had owed his life and someone he always poured his sorrows to when he was a child. That face…now that it was unveiled, Kakuzu recognized it immediately. Through quavering lips, the name escaped his sound tape eventually.

"O-Oniji-niisan?" he rasped in mistrust. If it wasn't because of the supporting tendrils, Kakuzu would have fallen to the floor, possibly traumatized with the visage of his presumably dead older brother.

Oniji grinned—it felt warmer now that Kakuzu could see his face. "Took you long enough, brother!" he chirped.

"I thought—I thought you're dead!" Kakuzu exclaimed after much of a difficulty.

"And, surprise, I'm not! Rikako's alive and well too, in case you're wondering. But she's not in this building currently. We lived in the center district under pseudonyms. We've been living there for years now." Oniji continued talking, not bothering to take point of his little brother's great amazement.

"Where…have you been all this time? Why didn't you tell me that you're alive?" Kakuzu kept interrogating, disregarding Oniji's amused storytelling. The older of the two stopped opening his mouth and his ever-present smile dissipated into a somber and more serious air.

"Forgive me for hiding the truth from you, my dear brother." he apologized, his head hanging low from his shoulders. He found the tiger-motif carpet an interesting object to see while he spoke the upcoming words: "First and foremost, I have to tell you something before you and our dear little sister, Mihoko, parted from me and Rikako. I was silently trained into a ninja, specialized in Genjutsu, ever since I started 'working'. I never really used that Genjutsu except on missions I kept secret from you and Mihoko."

"Wait…so Rikako knows _everything_?" Kakuzu inquired heatedly. His head began to throb with the bombard of facts.

"Yes." Oniji answered somberly. Then he continued, "My ability was put to a test on that day that changed our lives. Upon knowing that our biological father, Sadahige, was abusing you and Mihoko worse than before, I was forced to make a choice. It was the only option. So that was why, few days before, I requested Grandpa to take you and Mihoko to his house while I deal with Sadahige. That was my reason why I refused to live with him. I have to make sure Sadahige was locked down and keep them away from you. I suffered major injuries when I saved you and Mihoko that day and after I recovered, the Junshou before me prohibited me from seeing you, saying that it's better if you don't know about my existence until the time is right. He also told the same lie to Sadahige by changing his memory with Genjutsu. Ever since then, I'm working as an infantry ninja, having this cloth covering my face most of the time. However, the prison where Sadahige was locked up had an inmate riot occurring. Most of the prisoners managed to escape and Sadahige was one of them. It was mainly my fault. I was terribly ill when it happened and the force field which I guarded weakened."

"And that fault costed the life of our youngest sister." Kakuzu added bitterly. The delicate skin of his lower lip was abused profusely by his upper incisor teeth. His green eyes shut tightly, recalling the sour nostalgia of his teenage years.

"I know." Oniji said, his voice shaky and his breath cut in intervals. "I'm very sorry, Kakuzu."

"There's nothing we can do now. She's gone already and so is Sadahige." He released a mouthful of air aloud. He pocketed his hands and stared up to his older brother. "If there's nothing else, I shall be going. My wife and my son are waiting for me."

Oniji didn't answer and Kakuzu took that as a permission to go. He silently walked towards the door in which he came in few minutes ago. His head was still deeply dipped under the spinning dough of frazzling facts and belated regrets. He even didn't know about his feelings towards his apparently-alive brother. He was both overjoyed and furious. Overjoyed because he was still alive; furious because he made him go through all this mess. All he needed right that time was the warm air of family.

The hands clasped.

_Shinsei Ishi Kado!_

The floor rumbled and quaking terribly that the plant vases and pots tumbled and the soil were scattered everywhere. From those scattered soil, a Shinto gate with a figure's face and spikes on the roofs stood before Kakuzu, blocking him from the way out. He whipped his head to Oniji, searching for explanation. What he saw was something that he could not put in words.

"There is something that we can do." Oniji said solemnly. The bright spark in his eyes faded. It seemed invisible as he dashed in speed of sound at Kakuzu. In reflex of his sudden appearance in front of him, Kakuzu thrust a bone-cracking kick. Oniji managed to evade it by ducking. Knowing that he would come for the available, unprotected other leg, Kakuzu slammed his heel down. Too late, the older of the brothers received the floor-shattering blow. He splayed weakly on the broken floor, his body covered in dust.

Kakuzu, panting slightly, stared down at his brother. He wondered, _what the hell? What was he thinking now?_ He asked, nonetheless, "What's the meaning of that, Oniji? Are you thinking that by killing me, our problems will be solved?"

Oniji stared at him with one eye. It was somewhat blank, much to Kakuzu's discomfiture. "And you think standing still like a statue helps solve our problems too? Something needs to be done." he said, some words were stalled by grunts. Oniji pushed himself up, standing before his taller younger brother once more. "That's your problem, Kakuzu. Always too passive, always never want to be a leader. Your mind was confined by your timidity to move forward further. Desperate times take desperate measures, my dear brother, and this is what I do. I do fear losing, but that means I just have to work harder and prepare for the worst case scenario, in case all my hard work fails."

Kakuzu stared attentively at his bruised brother. Blood trickling from the side of his mouth, his cheek was swollen. Yet, he was still smirking at him.

"I heard of what happened. All those stitches, Sadahige gave it to you, didn't he? Using a kitchen knife he collected from our old house. Using the very same knife, he sent our little Mihoko to the afterworld through a painful procedure of blood loss. With that being done, you and your friend still stuck to the code of conduct. You were quite amazing, I have to say. You can still contain revenge even after you held the cold body of your sister. If I were you, I would screw all that I believe and satisfy my vengeance. You had your chance, Kakuzu, why did you hesitate?" At the last question, Oniji gazed deeply into Kakuzu's eyes. A smirk crossed his face.

Slowly and tentatively, Kakuzu's right hand rotated to the back. It rummaged his weapon pouch, grabbing a kunai out. The kunai was pointed toward his brother. Realizing what he was doing, Kakuzu tried to pull back his hand but to no avail. "Oniji! What's going on? What did you do to my body?" Kakuzu asked briskly, trying to stop his hand still.

"I'm executing my solution, Kakuzu. Sadahige's escape was my fault; therefore it was my fault Mihoko died. My mind is in the brink of breaking down right now. There's no use of me to live in this life. I want to die in your hands; you who held the most rage toward me. If it wasn't because of my little scheme, your life won't be like this."

"Stop it! Stop it, Oniji! This isn't what I want! Please! There must be another way!" Kakuzu shouted as loud as he could, hoping that his voice could penetrate the blockage in Oniji's brain. However, Oniji's blockade was many times denser than the jutsu he used at him earlier. Everything he plead had no use in releasing the Genjutsu he placed in him.

"Junshou-sama, what's the matter?!" the infantry ninjas barged in to the room, right after the shinto gate had crumbled down. They were inevitably astounded of what they found in the room. The Junshou's guest had bruised the Junshou and was pointing a kunai directly to his stomach. They pulled out their scrolls, weapons, and braced their hands in jutsu-using position. However, they were stopped.

"Let him!" Oniji shouted at his minions. "As soon as that blade pierced my skin, I forfeit my position as Junshou of this village. My brother, Kakuzu, shall be my successor. This is my ultimate order. Whatever you are thinking, I want you to obey my last order! Let me die in his hands. Let me die with shame." he declared. Slowly and resentfully, his minions stored their weapons. Some threw their faces away from the upcoming scene.

"Oniji!" Kakuzu screamed in vain. In the last seconds, he glanced one last time at his brother's blue eyes swimming in red sclera which the two men inherited from their homicidal father. It was in those azure eyes did he saw the pure essence of sacrifice. They were sparkling with optimism and hope that Kakuzu can inherit his position. Kakuzu stopped screaming and rebelling when the hands of his brother clasped around his that held the kunai.

Kakuzu could never forget the sensation when the kunai pierced Oniji's stomach. The blade stabbed deeply into the liver, inevitably killing him. Blood drooling plentifully from his stomach, soaking Kakuzu's hand crimson, much to his horror. The lively sparkle in his brother's eyes was gone and his body fell forward. Kakuzu still could feel pulse beating from his arteries—very weak. He lay him down on the floor, letting his head rest on his blood-free hand. Oniji's eyes looked for his face and once he found it, after a very long time, Kakuzu's eyes were wet.

"Oniisan…" he whispered to his dying older brother.

"Forgive me…Kakuzu…" Oniji whispered with the last fibers of energy he had left. "Forgive my selfishness. I just thought…maybe I…was the timid one. I was…too scared to face the future. I'm sorry…I don't know…how many times I should say it…"

"That's enough. You don't have to. You are my brother. You don't need to say sorry. It is I who need to say thank you."

Oniji's eyes momentarily expanded. "Why…?"

"I'm fine with the way I am now. I have met the most wonderful woman I have ever seen and married her. If you didn't do anything, I would have not met her. I owe it to you, Oniisan."

At his words, Oniji's mouth was pulled to the side, forming a pure smile of contentment. Although he smiled so sincerely, Kakuzu couldn't bring himself to do the same thing. "That's good to hear…" he said weakly. Then he added, "Kakuzu, I know about what those tendrils could do. My heart is still functional; take it."

Kakuzu stammered, "Wh-what? No, I can't."

"I'm begging you. Just think of it as a souvenir from me after our long years of separation. Take it so you can remember me and also Mihoko."

Kakuzu sighed exasperatedly. With much difficulty, he nodded to his brother's request. The stitches on his arm loosened, revealing dozens of strands of tendrils. They punctured Oniji's chest, digging deep and opened a hole big enough for Kakuzu's hand to get in and seize the still beating heart. Pushing back the urge to vomit, Kakuzu ripped the heart out and quickly inserted it to his chest. The new beating inside his chest felt strange to him. More blood flow inside his body, possibly enabling him to do something that most human beings cannot. He looked down to his brother…

And those blue eyes in red sclera were to be eternally locked behind the strongbox of his eyelids, never to be opened by any means possible. The body heat disparate at the same second the last exhale was blown. The mouth remained pulled sideways and it would stay that way until it disappeared behind the earth. Droplets of water wet his wintry skin; it came from the younger man holding him.

Kakuzu embraced the body of his brother, silently mourning his death. The infantry ninjas were mourning too. Oniji's most loyal minions dropped to the floor, their eyes were also wet with grief. Soon, the entire village was to be laminated in grief.

* * *

_That was the second time I attended a funeral and it was bigger than that of Mihoko._

_As his last message say, I became his official successor. It was already been approved by the landlords. I have to admit that I was impressed with Oniji's long planning. He did all that for me. What did I ever do for him other than do the honor to kill him? I suddenly felt so ashamed of myself._

_I made a reunion with my remaining sibling. The oldest from us four, Rikako. By the time I met her, I was instantly reminded of the only image of my mother. She resembled her so much it hurts. She lived well. She may not be a ninja, but she was married to one and she had already had two kids._

_It is ironic to see how many semblance we have with our parents. I remember Mihoko inherit our mother's eyes and hair. Her face was more to my grandmother. While the girls resembled our mother, Oniji and I resembled our father. That is why I said ironic. I hate Sadahige so much I ended up look like him, especially the eyes. The red sclera came from him. The girls didn't have red sclera. That and my short-fused nature. I never really get angry until I started to work as the new Junshou._

_Talking about being a Junshou, my position only lasted for a while. Around six to seven years later, there was a war between the Fire Country and the Stone Country—the two arch nemesis. Takigakure allied with Iwagakure and, therefore, my village acted on the frontline in the battle. I was in that war. With the help of Oniji's heart, I was able to do countless of things unimaginable, including staying active even after receiving many stab wounds._

_Then I met him: Hashirama Senju. The man who killed Madara Uchiha in the Valley of the End. The man who lead one of the biggest ninja village in the world. I fought him hand-to-hand and actually winning. I killed him by taking out his heart and steal it for myself. Takigakure had never been so victorious ever since._

_But the victory backfired at me._

_Because I killed Senju, the Fire Country considered Takigakure as a national threat and decided to attack my village. I was then turned into a scapegoat. Although I had tried to find a way, the elders had pulled away my position as a Junshou and exiled me, much to my dismay._

_I'm glad that my family didn't entirely shun me. I asked Tsukasa to take care of my wife and my kids, at least until my son Kiyohei was old enough to protect the family by himself. I never see them again ever since. And I found a way to drive my mind away from home. I was addicted with bounty hunting. It was a good sport for an outcast like me and it produced tons of cash—which actually the base of addiction._

_It took only a short five years for me to meet the man whom the world thought had died. Madara Uchiha, apparently, was still alive and he offered me to become a member of a criminal organization called Akatsuki. I was not the first to be recruited. The half-man half-plant from Kusagakure, Zetsu, was the first. No one knows how old he was. It's possible that he was even older than me. Anyway, I accepted his offer, although I had no intention of destroying my village. Unlike him._

_My personality had changed drastically in the years of my exile. Upon recalling, I realized how much more forgiving I was when I was young. The today me would found the word 'forgive' the hardest to spell. Even people still grows despite that their age was more than half of a decade._

_Maturity has a vast meaning and seemed to be limitless._

_It's one of fate's alleyways of life. _Probably_ (I have to insist on that), it was the not-so-elaborate path. I might be wrong. Study of life has never been my forte._

_I don't know what is the meaning of being mature yet, despite that I'm already in my ninth decade. But…being a human I am…I can always guess and made it up._

_Here's my definition:_

_Being mature is not having chest hair, big penis, or big muscles for men. Or having babies, having big boobs, and wide pelvis for women. It is also not to constantly read a fifteen inch thick book (that is SUICIDE). AND…it is also not having receding hairline, walking with sticks, and using fake teeth._

_Being mature is looking to your past and introspect your mistakes. Make sure you don't do the same idiotic thing again. After that, you keep moving on until your life is sentenced to an end._

_Have I covered everything?_

_Maybe yes. Maybe no._

_Beats me._

_But something I'm pretty sure about is I won't do the same mistake again. Well, at least, I try not to with all of my effort. I'd do anything to accomplish that lifelong goal, despite that it would kill me. Life demands sacrifice more than once and like it or not, we all have to do it._

_Sometimes…it wasn't so bad.__

* * *

_

**Damn plotbunnies! I'm having such a hard time writing this last piece of Kakuzu's past. It's such an ass… I never knew making a villain could be so hard, especially when it's not a psycho villain. Anyway, the last one is kind of disappointing. I just don't like how it ends. Seriously. I initially wanted to make an end scene connected to my other story Bird Cloth****, where Nagayoshi was actually reading Kakuzu's secret autobiography (which she stole). I might write it down; if you think it's a good idea.**

**Thank you for reading and have a good day! :D**

**Oh and don't forget the reviews! This desperate writer needs it.**


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